I went to see a friend recently and we talked about a new book that just came out, A Month of Sundays: Elevating Self-Care to Soul Care, by Davia William Stevenson, a clinical counselor. She explains how each of these topics affects our self and soul care.

Under five section headings, Physical, Mental, Relational, Emotional and Spiritual, are seventeen accessible chapter topics like self-identity, awareness, boundaries, dreams & aspirations, happiness & joy, conflict, inspiration and many others. Subheadings make referring, or picking up where you left off, super easy. It’s a book I plan to keep on my reference shelf for many years to come.

Because we’re always growing and developing, certain chapters will sound different at various points in our lives. I may not be going through relationship issues when I read the book the first time. But when I’m in the middle of one, I like knowing that I have resources that are going to make a profound difference. A Month of Sundays is that book.

I applaud the courage of the author for sharing her personal experiences and the insights she’s gleaned from her personal life and her clients. A Month of Sundays is sprinkled with illustrations that helped me apply larger concepts to many types of circumstances.

One of the chapters that really spoke to me was under the Emotional section, Grief and Loss. Stevenson explains that “…unprocessed grief and loss… doesn’t just add on or multiply on. It multiplies exponentially. And eventually, it’s going to surface.”

We’ve all heard the phrase, “count the cost” but how many of us have dug into the deeper meaning? By the time we graduate college, or hit middle age, or endure another divorce, many of us have become adept at dismissing our losses. All of us have lost something—precious, people, things, opportunities, relationships, pets, homes, jobs—many things if we’re honest with ourselves and take the time to acknowledge it. Some we might easily wave off—maybe you weren’t in love with your first goldfish; but it might have been the first significant pet loss of your life. And certainly, other losses have left their mark.

Stevenson explains how all those unprocessed losses affect everything in our lives, and until we deal with it head on, it will continue to do so. A Month of Sundays provides some tools to address this—even if you have never processed any of them and you’ve lived a long life. Before you begin thinking how tough you are for surviving so much, maybe it’s time to look at how you survived it.

When I was less enlightened, I used to evade my way through a great deal of pain by drinking, medicating, sleeping, or blatant denial. But that wasn’t dealing with the loss as much as outsourcing it to something else, at least until the sting faded. Those unprocessed losses got buried under the minutiae of life, much the way sensational news gets buried in the constant barrage more news. Understanding the necessity of processing loss and grief, and what I gained in joy and peace of mind, made processing a necessary part of loss recovery. Grief & Loss is just one sliver of a very rich book.

Massages are lovely but they won’t fix my relationships, or emotional state, or my spiritual crises. I’m thrilled that Stevenson has taken a long hard look at self-care and realized that we were just skimming the surface of a very, very deep pond. A Month of Sundays is a reference book that you will refer to again and again. If we’re really interested in taking the best care of ourselves and our souls, and improving the quality of our daily life, please consider healing those overlooked or unseen areas, which carry so much unresolved pain.

To elevate your self-care routine, click here on this affiliate-free link. What are your thoughts on self-care and soul-care? Leave your comments below, and I’ll see you again soon.