When the day to day becomes like a tidal wave threatening to pull you under how do you cope? This occasionally happens to all of us sooner or later, that overwhelm engulfs even the most self-aware among us.

I wanted to be “on” for the people I was meeting for the first time and the weather often did not co-operate. Health concerns, an over-committed schedule and stress led to a personal shutdown. My list of goals grew longer every day while my accomplishments seemed to shrink. The pressure seemed to come from all angles, and this merry (?) go round seemed endless. One person stated, “It just never ends.”

A well-known strategy for me is sharing from the heart with people I trust. Sometimes we’ll gain insights just by presenting the most pressing thing. My friends have often seen things that were hidden from me. I’ve said things that troubled me and then laughed because suddenly they sounded ridiculous in my ears. If the thought of going out was too much, sometime they came to me. I made a pot of tea and rejoiced that I had such good friends.

Coping with overwhelming responsibilities

Sometimes my personal plans blow up because someone needs me. This could mean that certain things don’t get done: dinners may be late, the laundry may slide, and my floor might go unswept.

In those moments, I have to hang up the superwoman hat. I can’t do it all myself. I live with other people and if I ask kindly, they’re usually happy to chip in and help. It means swallowing my pride (they’re not mind-readers) learning to delegate. It also means keeping my mouth shut when things aren’t done the way I’d do them. And being grateful for the help.

Handling “too much”

Some seasons of life are rough. As a creatures of habit, I don’t like unexpected things encroaching on my peace and well-being. The longer it lasts the more I feel the disruption rippling into other areas of my day. Other times, I may have two or three concerns that I’m not up to dealing with. Putting them off too long, causes stress and other delays. Even if they’re predictable concerns, like getting your driver’s license renewed, or new plates for the car or writing that blog post I’ve been putting off for days weeks months. Once I get that one thing out of the way, it’s amazing how the others don’t seem as pressing, or as loud… or as hard to accomplish.

You’ve probably heard that writing is cheap therapy. Everything that’s on my mind goes on paper. If you’ve never tried this, it’s incredibly cathartic. Pure honesty, no judgment, just get it out (thanks to shredders no one ever has to see it) After writing out the many concerns vying for my attention, I’m often surprised at how short the list is. Maybe you need to re-prioritize. Maybe something in your life need to stop. Or start. Or change.

If some task is particularly challenging, I sweeten the pot with an enticement worthy of the endeavor. rescuing a computer from a hacker is a perfect example. Regardless, I promise myself a well-deserved lunch at my favorite restaurant when the PC reboots ransomeware-free. Other ideas for rewards are a specialty coffee drink, a concert or music CD, an afternoon movie with the works. The idea is to move past the obstacle overwhelming you and look forward to the reward.

How do you deal with overwhelming disappointment?

Have you made room for something in your life that fell through? Or you didn’t make room for a thing you didn’t think would happen — and then it did? Sometimes with clients or projects the people you most want to work with aren’t the ones who become clients. Or a project that seemed perfect for you went to someone else or gets shelved until further notice. A medical diagnosis we didn’t expect turned our day upside down.

If you’re a person of faith, you can choose to believe in YeHoVaH, or a divine power greater than yourself. It’s comforting to trust that the Being who placed all the stars in the heavens and keeps the planets in orbit, is also at work in your life.

It’s healthy to grieve disappointments. How long it takes is different for everyone. Some events are worth a few minutes and others, such as the loss of loved ones, are worthy of a year and sometimes longer.

Rough seasons don’t last forever, and if you’re able to hang onto the important things, faith, family, and love with a good attitude, you can end up stronger than we started. Having a positive attitude isn’t about smiling and saying “it’s all good” when it isn’t. It’s about admitting where we are and reaching out for what we need until we get it. It’s also about enduring. It’s about finding the strength to get up when we’ve been knocked on our tush. And it’s about seeing this moment for what it is, accepting it and finding our way forward. But never ever give up. No matter what’s happening in your life, press into it. You’re almost there. The breakthrough is just around the corner.