I had a lot of fun writing a short story that went in unexpected directions. With good feedback from my beta readers I made some of their suggested corrections, found a fitting publication, uploaded the piece and hit “send.” And then, I forgot about it.

Life continued. I wrote books and networked over many mugs of steaming designer coffee. I launched a business, wrote articles, blog posts, and web content. While writing new short stories, I spoke to a group of would-be authors penning their first books about the broad stroke differences between traditional and self-publishing.

One day, an email email arrived from a potential publisher. They’d been passing my story around from editor to editor for two years and finally decided they weren’t going to publish it after all. The reason was that one of my characters—the stepmother—was just too “predictably mean.”

My first thought was, OMG, two years have passed since I sent this to you but you wrote me back!

Only another writer seeking publication can understand the significance of a publisher writing at all. Instead of being bummed out, I felt elated. I could take another look at the story and try to reimagine the stepmother. What I came away with was, I had a good story in play for two years!

You may wonder if this is a typical response to such an email. Well, probably not. I’ve had my share of rejections. Initially they sting. Then you realize that any response is better than none, and getting a personalized response is better than an auto generated one. Hearing nothing at all is pretty common. Availing yourself to (constructive) criticism helps you develop as a writer. Listening carries over into other areas of life too. Most of us like to think we’re doing just fine, but the truth is there are things we can’t see and that we could be doing better. Seeing a situation from another perspective just might drastically improve your life.

If I’d been stuck on deaf, I wouldn’t have heard my spiritual mentor say, “You really need to do something with your writing.” Others might have said it before, but due to a bad experience with a college professor, I mostly ignored what people said about my writing.

Because of my mentor, I submitted work to contests, journals and magazines. In those early nail-biting days, I what-iffed my ability. What if they don’t like it? What if I don’t place? What if they hate it and black-ball me? What if it gets rejected?

I had other thoughts too: If you don’t try you’ll never know what could have been. If you don’t send it out, it’s already “no.” If you just go for it, you will have taken one tiny brave step forward. That’s the thought that helps me press the “send” button.

Another time, I had a weird little story running around in my head. First thought said, “I can’t write that!” Later, I said, “Well, I’ll write it but no one has to see it.” When I finished it, I published it myself. People read it and enjoyed The Great Divide.

Each forward step requires courage, because you don’t know how it’s going to turn out. You might think you’re saving yourself from potential embarrassment by not sending out your work. But… You might send out a story and have it rejected, but picked up later by another publisher—it happens all the time. You might win a contest, get a contract or a check!

What does this mean for you?

Have you ever had someone encourage you in a way that profoundly affected your life? Because of my spiritual mentor, my life is on a very track I wouldn’t have considered. With one sentence she changed my thinking. I will forever be grateful that she took the time to tell me.

Maybe you know someone who has a particular gift or talent, but they’re not using it because they’ve been beat down or shot down. Maybe they’ve been told they’re one thing, but it’s clear to you they’re really something else. That was my situation. No one had been able to encourage my writing because my identity was “artist.”I still write for myself every now and again, but nothing satisfies my soul like helping literary dreams come true for others.  Is there someone in your circle of influence that you can affect with your encouraging words? Tell us in the comments below if you’ve had a mentor or been a mentor. We’d love to hear your story!